| My head looks like a battlefield atm , I don't know wich enemy to shoot first , wich one hurts me most or wich one i should hold close.
Even the smallest things confuse me or make me think too much , and as we all know thinking too much leads to mental pain, and exactly that pain is taking its price , it's even holding its grip on my body , a grip that gets tighter every minute and sometimes gets me close to the point where i'm suposed to choke. It keeps me awake at night , making my eyelids heavy during the day, basicly turning my life into a lifeless drag , a mix of random incidents that couldnt interest me less.
What goes for the head goes for the chest too. Confusion , anger but mostly pain , i think my heartbeats are screams of my heart,telling me it's suffering.sometimes a hurt is a good hurt , but i'm still waiting for the good part in my hurt. Waiting way too long , wishing way too much for things i know will never come.this thing is starting to kill me , inside first.
Loving you is hard , trying not to love you is even harder. I really dont want to love you , i dont, but i cant help this , and i really
cant stop this. I'm missing out on so much because of this , things i'll regret when i think about them later.
But for now , nothing in this world could mean more than you , if i had to wait for 5 more years , believe me i would.
I would. |
